LBD (Lesbian Bed Death)

Is lesbian bed death, better known as LBD, a curse for all lesbians or only some?
Has anyone out there actually survived in a relationship past 3 years without their sex lives dying and ending up as nothing but emotional cuddle friends with their partner?
Its so sad, when you love someone and are emotionally attached to them, when they know you inside out and accept you for who you are, but you have no sexual feelings for them anymore.
Yet another example of the unfortunate plight of a lesbian.

The great salt debate

It has been brought to our attention that salt may be a contributing factor in lesbianism.
A high intake of salt, in Nordic countries produces a higher volume of butch looking women when compared to Mediterranean countries for example, where the salt intake is not as high. Nordic countries traditionally use a lot of salt to preserve their foods, where as in the countries of southern Europe, the salt ratio in the diet is lower. This explains why there are  higher volumes of lesbians in Northern Europe compared to Southern Europe. It also explains the high incidence of PCOS amongst lesbians who generally eat a lot of salt. Too much salt messes with estrogen production, causing adverse reactions such as those experienced by poly-cystic ovary syndrome sufferers. There is not enough evidence to comment on the situation outside of Europe at this point.

Lesbians are all fucked up, that's WHY they are a lesbian

It's true. I have yet to meet a lesbian who has not had some disturbing life experience, a hormonal imbalance, a father who cheated, an ex-boyfriend who abused them, has lost an arm...
Yes, it all adds to the girl becoming confused, scared of men and pushes her to seek safety in the safe gay harbor  where she knows she will not be judged and can block those nasty experiences that pushed her away from being straight to the back of her mind.
Of course, SOME lesbians are born gay, and you also need to take into account those with horomonal imbalances etc., but a great many lesbians have, at some point had the propensity to be straight but have been tipped to the gay end of the scale by someone/ something fucking them up. Its like a making a cake: propensity to be gay + disturbing experience = lesbian sponge cake. Aren't we lucky?

That awkward moment when you come out & get a bad reaction....

It's only happened to me a small number of times. Once was yesterday. I tried to come out to one of my friends who I have only known for a month or so... I thought she was pretty cool so I hinted I was gay and her reaction? 'Oh no, I thought I could trust you?'. At which point I backpedaled and wimped out.
Homophobia seems especially rife among Eastern Europeans, which is a shame because they are such a laugh and easy going in many other ways.

Subtle signs to tell if someone’s a lezza

1. She has her hands in her pockets 90% of the time. When I say in her pockets, I mean, properly, deep in the pockets, not just the fingernails tucked in.
edit: The (literal) 'thumb rule' and the 'knuckle rule' apply here: if all the fingers are in the pocket including the thumb beyond the knuckles there is a higher chance she is a lez. Straight women do not have their thumb in the pocket, therefore the knuckles are out visible.

2. She may have one of the symptoms of polycystic ovary syndrome (the most common one is acne. check out the wikipedia article for further information)

3. Her nails will be short

4. She may wear little jewelry  and the jewelry that she does wear, will often be a dog tag/ crucifix
edit: or a rainbow bracelet 

5. Little or no make up
edit: most of the time, no blush

6. Shoes will be comfortable (vans, converse, other flats)
edit: it is harder to tell if someone is a lez in winter by considering nothing but the shoe element: the boots that gay and straight women prefer to wear might look similar in style. But in summer, it is a whole different story. We can go sit at some park and the play the game 'Spot the lesbian'!

Men are denied entry to lesbian bars...

... even when they are our closest gay friends!

As we all know, the security guard at the door of a lesbian bar/club is also a lesbian herself. Most of the time, they seem to have a problem with men. So what if we want to get our close gay guy friend into the same bar to have a few drinks together? The reason he wants to get in there is obviously not to perv on women! D'uh

Shouldn't gay culture embrace diversity? When did it become so picky? Isn't it a double standard that lesbians can get in any kind of bar (because otherwise they would accuse the management of being sexist or homophobic) but they don't do the same with men? 

Some say it's because lesbians have one decent night only once a week/month and the room shouldn't be flooded with men. Here is a suggestion that will please everyone: tell your lazy arse lesbian friends to go out more often instead of drinking beer at home with a girlfriend. In this way, more lesbian nights will be launched and the grumpy lesbian guards would not need to be overtly sexist and rude.